I don't really do resolutions. I like to think I do. I think everyone likes to think they do. Last year I opted to focus on one word, learn, and that was great. Rather than having this obligation looming over me that loses it's appeal after about 6 days I had a word. One thing to focus on. Learning. Such an awesome experience. I'll recap that whole experience next week. But for now I want to tell you how I'm approaching resolutions this year.
Right before new years while sitting in the little apartment we rented in Berlin I came across an article called "Forget Resolutions" by Amy Chan. Rather than resolutions she decided to make a daily contract with herself. Her aim is to make small every day changes not huge sweeping changes. Small changes equal great changes. Needless to say I was sitting there nodding and saying, "oh yes...this I can do."
So rather than a list of goals and resolutions I give you my contract with myself for 2014.
1. I'm going to put the pieces together.
That's code for, "I'm going to write that damn book." Here's the thing, like a puzzle all the pieces are there in a box they just need to be sorted out, sky, edges, colours etc, and then painstakingly put together. It's all there, honest, I just need a flat surface to spill it all out on and start the process of creating a beautiful picture.
2. Remember sucking at something is the first step at being sorta good at something.
I have a nasty habit of assuming I'm bad at things when really I'm not. I'm very black and white about things I am and am not good at. I don't allow room for being kind of good at something or sort of bad at something. I need to remember to trust the learning process. Just because my power slide in derby kind of sucks right now doesn't mean it's going to suck forever.
3. Smash the Scale
I've been a fan of the Militant Baker for a long time. When I saw her post about smashing the scale in 2014 I knew it was for me. I've had a love/hate relationship with my bathroom scale for most of my adult life and honestly I'm tired of it. A number will not dictate how I feel about myself or my body. My beauty and self worth is not defined by a number on a scale, inches on my waist or whether or not what I'm eating is "zero". My bathroom scale itself says I'm perfect. No really it does, so screw what the number says.
4. Math isn't stupid.
Over the Christmas break my best friend informed me that my goddaughter (whenever she does something weird suddenly it's "your goddaughter" not "my daughter"....hmmmm) was doing math for fun. Both my best friend and I went "ewww". Math is not our favourite thing in the world. I mentioned this to John and he immediately said, "Please don't say anything like that to Monkey. She doesn't need to know it's hard! At least not yet." He was incredibly serious. He followed it up with, "I better not ever hear you tell her you hate Math." Now, John has a Math and Comp Sci degree so of course he's pro-math but he's also right when it comes to making sure I don't pass on my dislike to my Godchildren or my nieces. Just because I think it's hard and have trouble understanding doesn't make it stupid. So I will try to learn to like math. No really. I even signed up for a real world math class.
5. Appreciate the time I DO have with John.
I complain A LOT about John being away a lot. And lets be honest, he is. But come on, get a grip and remember it could be worse. He could be further away. He could be away for a lot longer and a lot more. Now shut up and cuddle him.
6. Check yourself before you....alienate people.
I read something recently that jumped out and bit me. Sure people may say stupid things to us about living so far away, about us not having kids, about us traveling so much basically people are going to say stupid things and judge our life style. But how am I reacting to them? I can choose how to react to them. Duh! I can choose to think they're stupid and give them a dressing down or I can choose to smile nod and write it off as silliness. This kind of sounds like a no brainer but sometimes I react without thinking about how I react.
7. Continue to find joy.
No explanation needed.
8. The ipod goes bing, the computer goes ding and the phone goes ring but what does the Tatiana do?
The Tatiana needs to stop letting her life be ruled by technology. Just because I get a new email while I'm watching a movie doesn't mean I need to read it right now. Just because I get a text while making dinner doesn't mean I need to check it this moment when I should be caramelizing onions.
9. Breath more fret less.
Fretting is like chewing gum to solve a math problem. If I can't fix something for whatever reason I need to just breath and not fret.
10. Clean your roller skate bearings more often...no really....do it....you know better.
I'm the co-trainer of one derby team and the head coach for a national team. There's no reason I should slack in skate and gear maintenance. I replaced my knee pads for the first time in 5 years of derby, that's a start now keep it up.